I’ve been an ER nurse for 6 years. In that time I’ve traveled to different cities and worked with the homeless, elderly, minorities, children, and any walk of life you can imagine. Even to an ER nurse, some of the hardest times are when a patient dies that you’ve worked so tirelessly to save. Maybe they have 2 young kids at home and you know the doctor is going to have to break the news that mommy or daddy won’t be coming home that night. Maybe it’s the young toddler that got away from mom and dad and fell into the backyard pool. Or a grandmother with a do not resuscitate order and our only job is to keep her comfortable as she passes in our cold, stark, ER room surrounded by strangers instead of her own family. The one common denominator we all share is we will all, at some point, be the one facing the moment when, no matter how good a medical team is surrounding us, we are the ones who faces mortality.

On several occasions, I have found myself more than once looking into someone’s eyes and wondering what is it they are seeing right now. From our side the answer seems obvious, nothing. Eyes not responding to light, staring up at a white tiled ceiling never blinking. Darkness covers their eyes, but this is an illusion because of how big the pupils seem to be. Once considered a window to their souls is shrouded in stillness and darkness. The nurses have a moment where they take one final look before they return to their job or have an informal debrief at the nurse’s station. Doctors walk away to deliver news to the family or to the next patient’s room trying to treat them as if nothing happened five minutes prior. No matter who the staff is or what transpires after the ER just seems to have a much somber atmosphere. It is the ERs way of paying respects to the family and the loved one they just lost. We sympathize and wish we really could have done more. But “I’m sorry we did everything we could” seems hollow and rigid even to those who deliver such a message.

What seems to be the most repeated phrase in between sobs from the family is “I wish I had one more day with them”.  Through all the work we do as ER staff this will always be the one request we cannot fulfill. No matter what we do we cannot give one more day. No amount of words in any particular order will never be said in the loved one’s voice. We cannot give back their touch, smell, kisses, hugs, their laughter, or advice. I LOVE helping people, that is one of the reasons I became a nurse, but in these moments even I feel helpless. There is so much I want to do but know I cannot. I do cry with you not because the person we just tried to save had some influence on my life but because of the hurt I feel when I see you hurting and for the whole reason I’m in my position was to help and here I stand unable to do so. I cry for your hurt I weep because this is the one time I cannot give you what you need, your family member back.

 

How depressing if this was where it ended? Family crying by the side of their loved one, wishing with everything they are just to have just one more day. What price would they pay to be able to have even another hour to have dinner with them again? What price would a wife give to see her husband hold thier child, to hear his laugh, to feel the warmth and security of his embrace. How much would a mom pay to see her daughter walk down the aisle or a grown child wishing mom and dad were around so they could ask for advice?  Nurses and ER staff crying unseen with you at their computers. Wishing that truly they could have done more to save you this pain you’re feeling now but unable to do so. They too want to heal your physical pain as well as your emotional hurts. They know the one thing you so despratly crave is the one thing they can not provide, your loved one. In the midst of all this, it’s easy to ask “what’s the point? We live a short time and die, for what?” Or to view life as hopeless.

However, what hope would be brought if someone could step forward and say “you will see them again”? Someone who could respond to “I wish I had one more day” with “Wish granted”. If someone could promise not just one last meal with them but to never have to have another meal apart from them ever again. How would that change the atmosphere in the ER room? In this scenario, the family would’ve been willing to pay any amount of money to have one just one day with their loved one but instead of “one day”, someone offers to never have to be apart ever again. How much would that be worth? Someone might be willing to pay a handsome reward just for one day, how much more if instead on only one day forever was being offered? Would you sell your house for that? How about emptying your bank account? How much is hearing “your loved one is alive” worth in the moment when they were just pronounced? How much if not only alive for one day but for eternity? The truth of the matter is this offer is being made to you and me every day and the price will cost you nothing monetarily. That’sright! A promise of forever with those closest to you will cost you nothing!

Jesus Christ voluntarily gave up His life on the worst torture device people could think of for payment already. He then raised Himself from death into a new body so we could also live again.

“The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life—only to take it up again. No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have authority to lay it down and authority to take it up again. This command I received from my Father.””

‭‭John‬ ‭10:17-18‬

Something we would be so willing to pay for is being offered to us for FREE!!! Our only requirement is that we love Jesus more than we love anything else. The sting and victory of death is the hoplessness and dispair and finality that comes with it. But through Jesus Christ we can join Paul in exclaiming “Where, death, is your victory? Where, death, is your sting?” 1 Cor 15:55. That lonly ER room will still be mournful, however becasue of Jesus Christ family can sing songs of praise and joy. They can hold on to His promises and in between sobs hold on to the promise that this is not the end.

Praise to Jesus Christ death has lost!